Sunday, June 7, 2015

Girl Talk Sunday - "Haters" or "Frenemies"

Woohoo! It's Girl talk Sunday once again! You guyyyyss... Look how fast the time is going! I mean this is my 3rd time posting a girl talk Sunday series. I don't mind because I like it but wow it is just so fast, I woke up and thought "huh, I'm feeling inspired, what should I post today?" and once I looked at the date today I was like "It's Girl Talk timmmeee!" so you guys know the drill, but if you're new to my channel, Hi I'm Joyce and I love sharing quotes or motivational and inspiring words that I found around the internet and breaking it down like it's kind of a mini story time. So shall we? *well there's nothing you can do about it now, I'm just gonna start rambling already* And I'm warning you, this is gonna be looooong since I had way too much caffeine and I really wanna get into this topic.

Okay, so I've recently found an awesome lady on youtube and I just went bananas over her, and crazy me I almost forgot to say her name she is Dani A.K.A. CoffeeBreakwithDani. She is funny, beautiful, informative and I love her makeup vanity setup (Like omigosh!), I just can't believe I didn't find her sooner. But anyway, the stalker that I am, I binge watch her videos and I saw her video about being a youtuber or youtuber's diary (I'll link it below). And in that video, she answered the questions like "how long until she hit record" or the best thing and the worst thing about youtube. I know and heard from other youtubers that it is really never easy putting yourself out there for the world to see and just hearing Dani say that if she ever deletes her channel and social media accounts or practically disappear from the face of the earth, it is because of all the mean comments she's been getting. My heart just melted, because I even if I'm not yet a youtuber, that is the reason why I don't want to start my channel just yet. I mean, I have a channel but I'm just so afraid to post videos for everyone to see and judge with just having an intention to be informative / help other girls dying to know what I already do or know. 

Either way, whether you do something good or bad, you will be judged. It's just how everyone is these days. They say that it is best to not care at all but just starting from the very bottom, without knowing anyone in the industry, without a really good amount of viewers and commenters, if 1 person decides to watch your video and comment something mean and irrelevant about it, everyone else would be forced to see it too. It goes on until you see it for yourself and be self-conscious about it. Your part in it is to not be affected by it and still be yourself because that is what makes you unique and happy.

Anyway, I saw that Dani posted this on the description box under that video:

"I don't wrestle with pigs. We both get dirty, but the pig enjoys it." I learned the hard way not to fight back. That's typically what 'haters' want and they will always manage to use it against you. It's funny because they invest so much time on you, you start to wonder if they have an alter for you in the back of their closet. I hope you're using my favorite selfie.

I don't know how I could express how much this speaks out to me and most girls everywhere in the world, so I'm just gonna keep typing out words and hopefully it makes sense for you guys. This is a touchy topic because almost all my life, I engaged with "friends" that I thought really cared about me. They invested so much time just to get to know me, have a day out with me, do makeovers, just almost everything that you would expect friends that are teens usually do (yes, the good and the bad). And in the end, they betray you, you would never thought that they will be the one who would say nasty stuff about you to someone else. You never thought that she would wanna see you suffer and laugh when you're not watching. What hurts more is, you didn't have a clue why was it happening and who did it. You become vulnerable in their eyes and trust them. But in the end you'll suddenly realize that they had this all planned out just to see it happen to you. Why? Because some people would really help you become the best you, but remember that they don't want you to be better than them. 

I am honestly now still dealing with someone like that. And being in the age I am right now, I learned to read between the lines and see through the smile. I know I'm not paranoid because I have real friends that are way different than her. Funny how people bring up your past so much that they intend to use it to destroy your future. So I started avoiding her. Dodged her calls, her texts. Because if she were really being a friend, she would accept my past and be part of my future. 

I know that feeling when you think that she's your only friend, that you don't have a choice but still be with her. Well you could. Yea, but be the better person in the "friendship". Don't ever do what they did to you because in the end, you know you're not like that. You'll just feel really bad and forget that she did the same to you. Okay, so sometimes it's not even like that, that you're purpose wasn't for revenge, but it becomes an instinct to you that "oh, maybe this is how our friendship is now" so you do the same backstabbing that they did unintentionally. And knowing you thought and did it, you know that the friendship has destroyed you. So be free little one, life's too short to settle for less. You deserve a better friend and it's never wrong to walk away from something you don't feel happy about. It will be a life lesson to you that you would carry on and would be able to share with others and what to do if they are stuck in the same situation. We all make mistakes, but your mistakes does not define you. 

Taking time in writing this, I realized that, if you really love the thing that you do, nothing would stop you from keeping on doing it. So I think that if you ever plan on starting a youtube channel, a blog or whatever that would put you in the public's eye, be sure that you love what you do. Because you can't convince anyone if you yourself isn't passionate about it. Even if you aren't the best out there, just knowing for yourself that you did your best is way more than enough. So be strong, don't let the hate get to you. There are plenty of people who would appreciate what you do and maybe they're the shy ones who just read and don't comment but still follow your advice on life. So keep a smile on your face, you'll never know if an admirer is watching. 

Thanks for reading my post guys and hope that this has helped you if you are going through the same situation or if one of your friends or family members are going in it, then don't hesitate to share this with them and be there for them at the same time. My purpose in doing this is to share with everyone my experiences and stories and hope that it'll send out the message that you are not alone and to be strong. If I got through it, they could too.

Until the next blog!

CoffeeBreakwithDani video: Click HERE
Wanna see my other girl talk topics? Click HERE
Or are you in need for back to school beauty advice? I got you, it's HERE

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